I'm not real big on Father's Day. Maybe it's because I don't consider myself to be a very good father. And I'm not at all close to my own father. I always wanted a great relationship with my father. It just never happened. There is a lot of hurt inside of me that was caused by my dad while I was growing up. I'm not sure if it will ever heal. But I've come to accept that.
I suppose I do/have done some things right as a father. But I feel like I've failed more than I've succeeded. That sucks, too, because I always wanted to be the best father in the world. Unfortunately, I think I'll have to settle for mediocrity.
As I type this, my wife and youngest son are up north at my wife's parents' house. And my oldest son is at his three quarter house on the other side of town. But I'm about to leave to go visit my oldest, take him out to lunch, and maybe take him shopping for some new clothes that he needs. I also got up early and baked him a couple dozen cookies. I hope he appreciates them.
So Happy Father's Day to all the dads out there. Being a parent is the hardest job on this planet. Even when things go smoothly. If things don't go smoothly, it becomes even harder. Trust me. I know. I will continue to do the best that I can, and I hope that as the years go on my boys recognize the fact that I tried my damndest.
In my book, you are a very good father because the definition of a parent (to me) is one who WANTS to do what's best at all times, who LOVES unconditionally and who DOES THEIR BEST. All of us mess up, none of us are perfect, but even that is part of parenting - teaching our children that when there turn comes, they don't have to be perfect either. They just have to love their kids and always do what they believe is best.
ReplyDeleteHappy belated Father's Day. Did he like the cookies? How can you not see you're a great dad if you made him all those cookies!! :)