Sunday, May 1, 2011

Putting my money where my mouth is

Back in early January, my son mentioned to me that two of his favorite bands, Deftones and Dillinger Escape Plan, were coming to Detroit on the same bill and that he really wanted to go. Being a huge music fan myself, and knowing how cool it is to see two of your favorite bands at the same show, I thought seriously about buying tickets. But my son wasn't living up to what he had promised to do, so I decided against it.

A few days later, I started thinking about buying the tickets again. After all, it was only mid-January. Surely by May--almost four months later--my son will have made progress, and going to that concert would be a nice reward for him. So I took the plunge and spent $115.20 on a pair of tickets.

Fast-forward to today, Sunday, May 1st. It's the day of the show, and nothing with my son has really changed. He still hasn't looked seriously for a job. He still balks at doing chores around the house. He still stays up all night and sleeps all day, into the evening. He's still stuck in a rut and isn't doing anything to help himself out of it.

In the not-too-distant past, I'd have caved and let my son go to the concert anyway, because...Well, because I've been a total sucker who's been played like a violin over and over and over for the last six years. But not this time. There's no way in hell I'm rewarding my kid for inactivity this time around. I decided a week ago that him going to the show was out of the question, and I listed the tickets for sale on both eBay and Craigslist.

Unfortunately, as of 10:30 this morning no one has bought the tickets, which I've now got listed for $60.00--less than half of what I paid for them. But it doesn't matter to me anymore. It doesn't matter if I sell the tickets for $60.00 or $40.00 or $20.00, or whether I just give them away to someone--which is something I will seriously consider doing if no one buys them--or eat them altogether. I don't care about the money anymore. I care about standing up for what I believe in and not being a sucker anymore. Finances are incredibly tight for my family, and the thought of throwing away more than $100.00 is not an appealing one. But I'm putting my money where my mouth is this time around. Besides, maybe $115.20 in exchange for a life lesson for my son isn't a total waste of money.


  1. Frustrating as it is, you did the right thing. Just goes to show how much we can't predict the future. Sigh.

  2. I would have done the same thing (got the tickets in hopes....) I ended up giving them away at the end (don't even ask how much money I wasted, it was a lot). I tried selling them then put out an announcement on my blogs, facebook and Craigslist. An FB friend from New Orleans called to say her husband was in LA and he'd take the tickets. I emailed them to him and he had a great time.

  3. Excellent work. It must be tough to stick to your guns. But I'm certain you are doing the right thing. Unfortunately, it doesn't always feel good to do the right thing.